P.E.T.A. (Polar-bear Extinction Team Associated)

Remember Knut? The ‘kute’ baby polar bear and superstar of the Berlin Zoo? Well, PETA, the international guild of dog-murderers are claiming that he is ‘disturbed,’ and that this shows quite plainly that ‘polar bears do not belong in captivity.’

Apparently, he sways to and fro, which is abnormal although PETA do not mention how long they spent in the company of polar bears in the wild to discover that they don’t do this. Also -and I would guess that this is what really upsets PETA- the most popular polar bear in the world has started to imitate the people photographing him by standing up and mimicking the action with his paws. Oh heavens! This animal has obviously been tainted by human contact… the end times are upon us, horses are going to start eating each other etc. etc. etc. Given PETA’s record with traditional human-companion symbiotes I suppose the idea that such a majestic wild animal like the polar bear starting to show signs of domestication (imagine if, after several generations in captivity and successful breeding programmes polar bears became as docile as dogs! Oh, the horror) is one step too far. PETA have had problems with Knut before, don’t forget, even when he was a kute liddle bay-bee.

Another thought that occurs to me is that if the breeding population of polar bears in captivity were removed, then that adds more ammunition to the ‘think-of-the-poor-polar-bears-with-no-ice-to-sit-on’ wing of the Climate Change Church. Despite the fact that polar bears are actually doing all right in the wild, thankyouverymuch.

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