Just Say What You Mean, Hugh

Hugh Ferny-What’shisface was on BBC Breakfast this morning, saving the chicken again. To set the scene, they had a little segment of him in Tesco sounding off about ‘2 for £5’ fresh chickens and how it’s impossible to produce a chicken for £2.50. He interviewed one solitary old lady, who you were set up to believe was buying special offer chicken because she was hard up. No! She gets them and feeds one to her dog! Neatly setting you up for what was to come. I wonder how long they waited to find her.

Back on the sofa, and all seemed well until the script turned to the subject of the recession.

“It’s all very well saying that ,” remarked the interviewer, “but what about people who simply can’t afford to pay three or four extra pounds for a chicken? There are a lot of them.”

Now at this point I was fully expecting him to say something along the lines of ‘if you can’t afford a well-treated chicken then you shouldn’t be eating them.’ Oh no, it’s far more clever than that. He waffled on for a little while about some RSPCA-sponsored half-measure and then got onto his next point:
Apparently ‘several major supermarkets (Sainsbury and the Co-Op) are already on-board in removing battery chickens from sale, and we hope to persuade the major chains to follow.’

Brilliant, basically a campaign to remove the cheapest source of ‘proper’ protein (ie not reclaimed and coated in breadcrumbs) available to those on lower incomes, first on a ‘voluntary’ basis. We’ve never heard that before, have we?

Update: From now on, I’m going to refer to this pillock as Hubert Cumberdale:

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