Dear Sirs and Madams of the United Kingdom,
I would like to apply for the post of Speaker Of The House Of Commons. I believe I am well qualified for the post, as I am not a member of nor am I affiliated with any political party. On the contrary, I believe all the parties in the present Parliament to be comprised of self-indulgent, greedy and corrupt bastards of the highest order, a view that I am sure would ensure my complete impartiality. While I am not a sitting MP, I believe under the current system this could be easily arranged. I have voted only once, and as my preferred candidate did not win I am well prepared to forgo this privilege. I am also prepared to wear a silly wig if required. I am a hard working and reliable individual and while I am aware that I am over-qualified for the role I would like to assure you that I would enjoy the role immensly and execute my duties with dedication and care.
Please find attatched my C.V.
I look forward to hearing fro you in due course, Yours,